I am a GIANT wuss

My inbox is always full of junk email. I get approximately 22 emails from deal sites around Seattle.

I am addicted. Groupon, Living Social, Pop Sugar, Bloomspot, you name it, I am a subscriber.

They are a terrible addiction. Here is why. Any rational person would stop, step back and ask themselves, “would I really buy this if it weren’t discounted?”

Me? I’m like a kid in a candy shop. “ridiculous things I wouldn’t ever consider buying in real life?? SIGN ME UP!” 

Gah. I have a problem.

Either way, one of these deals brought me to a freezing cold warehouse in South Seattle with the s-mom. We were the only ones in this warehouse, there was strange techno music blaring and faint disco lights bouncing off the walls.

No, I didn’t get murdered in said warehouse.

Turns out, there is quite a following for the circus arts in our area. And this particular venue had a groupon for trapeze lessons.

(see… WTF)

I wish I had picture after picture of me swinging through the air with the greatest of ease.

Instead, the ONE picture would be of me, clinging like a koala to the bar, refusing to play. They asked me if I wanted to go again, I looked at them with disdain and said, “no. this isn’t my thing.”

Yeah, you heard me, I’m just too “cool” for this trapeze thing. In reality, it took 40 minutes for my stomach to stop trapezing itself into my throat, and another 20 before I felt like my own self.

Note to self: terrified of heights.

Meanwhile, my s-mom was flinging herself around, letting go of the bar and into the arms of a stocky, extremely muscular Dutchman.

I can’t make this shit up.

It was a strange way to spend a Wednesday morning, but I learned a few things from my experience. One, I can’t pursue a career in circus arts… damn. Two, warehouses are impossible to heat. Three, you must have a SHIT ton of muscle to be in the circus. Four, circus arts throw me off my daily routine, resulting in almost zero exercise and zero cooking today.

Basically, everything about today was an epic fail.

However, I plan on running and yogaing tomorrow. So take THAT derailment of work out goals.

I also discovered the joys and wonders of Pinterest, and have decided to craft my life away. Christmas 2011– you are going to be one epic year.

Tomorrow– how yoga and christmas connect. Get ready.

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