Facebook keeps telling me I need to start online dating.
“Feeling lonely? Don’t worry, we have hot men waiting for you.” These ads are accompanied with pictures of tan, muscular men with weird hair and movie star smiles.
Come on Facebook, if you are as creepy as you seem, you should know that my type of men are tall and thin. The ones with unruly hair and the faint smell of bike grease on their skin. The men that can work with their hands, and have probably built something in their life—a chicken coop, a bicycle, a canoe.
Facebook, you should know that the kind of men I like are the ones that make me work for it. The ones that tease me with smiling eyes and unavailable words. I like the challenge of wooing them as a surprise, I like to be the thing they never saw coming.
Stop smothering me with pictures of happy couples and suggesting I get on websites where online profiles highlight all those things people wish they were. Those things don’t work for me.
I don’t care that you only want to talk about yourself for three hours. I don’t care that you are trying to live up to this persona you created for yourself late at night, as you debated whether you could repress the shame of OkCupid.
No. I don’t want to go grab a drink as I pull conversations out of you while you awkwardly shift and play with your hands. No, I don’t want to go on first date after first date, each one beginning with a sigh and ending with an ass-out hug.
I haven’t felt that deep tickle in my belly for quite some time, and while bouts of loneliness hit me like a ton of bricks, I’m working on practicing patience. I know that an organic kind of love is up my alley. The kind that you don’t look for, you just kind of stumble upon it one day while you’re out for coffee. Or browsing the produce at the grocery store.
I don’t want to search for love anymore. If it finds me again, as it has in the past, I want it to fall into my lap. I want the next man I swoon over to be someone who is humble and kind. A man who knows himself and doesn’t feel the need to flash his feathers and puff out his chest. I want the next great love of my life to involve a comfort that seeps into the relationship from the get go. Where the walls come down and dedication and honesty are second nature. It’ll be the kind of love that’s like breathing—just something you do everyday. In and out.
In and out.
Overnight Oats & Orange Cinnamon Iced Coffee
In this fantasy of mine where I end up with a tall bearded fella who happens to love to cook, raises chickens and is a wealthy bike mechanic/brewer/artist (let me know when you find him), I imagine that we have our morning routine. French press iced coffee prepared the night before and a variety of staples. Fresh juices, pancakes when we’re feeling fancy, and overnight oats on the mornings that are feeling rushed. Here’s to hoping.
Over Night Oats
- 1/2 cup almond milk
- 1/3 cup rolled oats
- ½ Tbsp chia seeds
- Pinch salt
- Pinch cinnamon
- 1/3 cup strawberries
- 1/8 cup walnuts, chopped
- 1 banana
The night before, combine your oats, almond milk, chia seeds, salt and cinnamon in a jar, cover and place in the fridge. In the morning, chop up all your delicious toppings and enjoy. I sometimes add in some peanut/almond butter if I need extra protein for the day.
Orange Cinnamon Iced Coffee
**This is for an 8 cup French press
- ½ cup coarsely ground coffee
- ½ cinnamon stick
- ¼ tsp ground cardamom
- ¼ tsp ground nutmeg
- ¼ tsp ground ginger
- 2 whole cloves
- ½ of a star anise
- Zest of ½ an orange
Combine the coffee, spices and orange zest in your French press. Add in cold filtered water and put in your fridge overnight. Press down in the morning, mix with some almond milk and a little agave (if you feel so inclined), and revel in the magic of cold brewed coffee at home.